Situationally Comedic Persons #5: Hey, Gorgeous

"January 9th, 2026 12:46 pm. Multiple co-workers reported having the same dream as I did... A sort of... Speedo man... Just... Laying there... Menacingly... Breathing on you..."

Transcript

Patrons

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Cast & Crew

SCP Archives was created by Pacific S. Obadiah & Jon Grilz

"Situationally Comedic Persons" was written by Hannah Schooner & Giancarlo Herrera

Kurt & Burt - Josh Rubino

Janice - Kayla Temshiv

Fren - Erika Sanderson

Rodney - TJ Berry

Holmwood - Jordan Cobb

Supervisor 1 - Derrick Valen

Supervisor 2 - Ashley Heather Quills

Teddy - David Ault

Secretary - Pacific S. Obadiah

Operator - Hannah Schooner

Mendoza - Rissa Montanez

Mama Urt - Josh Rubino

Reality TV Show Host - Bailey Wolfe

Podcast Host - Fay Roberts

Elevator - Tal Minear

Speedo Man - Derrick Valen

Telephone AI - Rebekah McLoughlin

Art by Pacific S. Obadiah

Theme Song & Original Music by Mattie roi Berger

Dialogue Editing - Giancarlo Herrera & Hannah Schooner

Sound Design - Hannah Schooner

Directing by Giancarlo Herrera

Showruning - Daisy McNamara

Creative Director - Pacific S. Obadiah

Executive Producer - Tom Owen

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